30 day writing challenge day 11! 

  Something you always think “What if…” about. 
      Ah the “What ifs” play a big part in my social anxiety life. Everyday I hear “what if” inside my head, more than anything. 

  The moment I wake up- “what if I have a panic attack today, should I just stay in bed? What if today is ten times worse than yesterday?” 

Any time I want to leave my house- “what if your car breaks down, then what?”, “what if you have a panic attack while out and no one is around to help you”.

Anytime I’m in a public place that contains of a waiting room, “what if someone notices me in the corner of the room trying so hard not to freak out”, “what if someone calls me out for looking outrageously terrified?”, “what if I can’t leave the room and just break down right here in front of everyone.” 

This is seriously the tiniest list of “what if’s” that my brain goes over and over, everyday.